Every great story starts with a meeting — from awkward introductions to memorable encounters, those first moments are ripe for comedy gold. Whether you’re swiping right, shaking hands, bumping into someone in line, or attending that painfully silent Zoom meeting, there’s always room for a perfectly timed pun to break the ice.
These 270+ meet jokes and puns are your go-to arsenal for first dates, first impressions, or whenever you want to meet someone with a laugh. (Yes, there are some delicious “meat” jokes too — we couldn’t resist.)
Meet Cute, Pun Cuter
For romantic run-ins and rom-com-worthy punchlines.
I met someone cute today… and tripped over a parking cone.
Our eyes met — then we both looked at the dog.
Love at first meet? More like awkward smile and shuffle.
We met in a bookstore. Now he’s my type.
I told her she looked familiar. She said, “Do you stalk often?”
We didn’t just meet — we collisioned.
I met my soulmate. She left her coffee on my car.
It was a meet cute… until I spilled ketchup.
I said “Hi,” he said “Bye.” Still counts.
Our hearts met. Then our dogs started fighting.
Meet Market Mayhem
When meeting new people feels like speed dating at a carnival.
I went to a singles mixer — and came home with snacks.
Speed dating? More like speed escaping.
We met at Costco. Love in bulk.
“Where’d we meet?” she asked. “In my dreams,” I said.
First impressions matter. That’s why I wore a cape.
“Nice to meet you!” “We’ve met three times.”
They said, “Dress to impress.” I wore a hot dog costume.
I meet new people like I meet stairs — awkwardly.
I make eye contact once and plan the wedding.
Met someone named Kevin. I now trust no one named Kevin.
Work Meet Weird
Office greetings that deserve HR review.
I met the CEO. I had spinach in my teeth.
“This is our new intern.” “Hello, I’m anxiety.”
We met at the copier. Romance was jammed.
I mistook the manager for IT. Now I am IT.
My work badge says “Todd.” My name’s not Todd.
Met my cubicle neighbor. He’s collecting forks.
I waved in a meeting. Forgot my camera was off.
Introduced myself in Teams chat. Spelled my name wrong.
My boss introduced me twice. Still forgot my name.
“Nice to meet you.” “We’ve worked together for 3 years.”
Meat & Greet
Because meat jokes were born to grill.
I met a butcher. He gave me the cold cuts.
Don’t trust steak on the first meet.
That burger was rare — like true love.
We met over ribs. Now we’re bone-afide friends.
The sausage party? Awkward.
We met in a deli. She was pastrami-perfect.
Bacon met eggs. It was sizzling chemistry.
I meat people with open arms and full stomachs.
He was beefy, but emotionally medium-rare.
I never ghost people I meat online.
Awkward Meet-Ups
Where everything that could go wrong… goes wrong.
I went for a handshake. She went for a hug. We tangoed.
I called her mom. She was my date.
We met. Then he asked if I liked jazz. I panicked.
I forgot his name mid-sentence. So I called him “Champ.”
I waved. He waved behind me.
We both reached for the last donut. Now we’re engaged.
My voice cracked during “hello.” End scene.
Met her dog before I met her. Dog liked me more.
I spilled coffee on his shoe. Still more graceful than usual.
“Do I know you?” “No, but my dog follows you on Instagram.”
Zoom & Greet Disasters
Where technical difficulties meet human ones.
“Nice to meet you!” — said to a muted mic.
I waved, then realized it was a screenshot.
Met my boss’s cat before my boss.
I joined the meeting with a filter. No one said anything.
“Is this the right meeting?” Nope. Stayed anyway.
I thought my camera was off. It wasn’t.
Introduced myself — then froze mid-wave.
My name showed as “Dad’s iPad.” I’m not a dad.
Met a coworker in real life — he was taller than his Wi-Fi.
“Nice to meet you” — 3 seconds before the call ended.
First Date Fumbles
Love at first meet? Maybe next time.
We met at a sushi place. He brought a lunchbox.
I said “I love dogs.” She said, “I’m allergic to fun.”
He showed up in Crocs. I showed up in judgment.
We both reached for the check. Then faked bathroom breaks.
She said she loved long walks. I got shin splints.
We met for coffee. He brought his mom.
I brought flowers. She brought allergies.
We talked for hours… about her ex.
We met at a dog park. I don’t have a dog.
I spilled water. He called me “hydration hazard.”
Online Meet-Cutes
Swipe right into laughter.
“Hey.” “Hey.” “…” True romance.
We met online. Our connection lagged IRL.
His profile said “6’1” — he meant emotional inches.
She said “I love mystery.” So I ghosted.
Our first meet was virtual. Our second was awkward.
His username was “HuskyDaddy42.” He had a cat.
We connected over memes. Broke up over grammar.
She liked puns. I proposed.
He asked, “Do you like dogs?” I replied, “Who doesn’t?” He unmatched.
We met on a dating app. Still haven’t updated our relationship status.
Reunion Riddles
Old friends, new awkwardness.
We met again — she remembered everything. I remembered nothing.
“High school reunion” is code for “name tag panic.”
I called him Greg. His name was Chad.
She showed me our yearbook photo. I blamed puberty.
We met after 20 years. Still talked about cafeteria pizza.
“Remember me?” I said. He didn’t.
I confused her with my ex. I’m single again.
We reconnected — and immediately unfriended each other.
“You haven’t changed!” Thanks, I guess?
We hugged like we meant it. We didn’t.
Family Introductions Gone Weird
Because meeting the in-laws is a sport.
I met her dad. He asked my credit score.
I brought wine. They’re in recovery.
I called her aunt “Grandma.” She wasn’t flattered.
Her brother asked me to arm wrestle. I lost.
I laughed too hard at her mom’s joke. She wasn’t joking.
I complimented the casserole. It was store-bought.
Her grandma pinched my cheek — and stole my fries.
I tried to be charming. I ended up chair-squeaking.
They asked about kids. I asked about dessert.
Her uncle said, “You again?” It was our first meet.
Speed Meet Speed Fail
10 seconds of awkward energy.
“Tell me about yourself.” I forgot who I was.
I blinked and it was over. Story of my love life.
“Fun fact?” “I collect erasers.”
I started with a knock-knock joke. It bombed.
She said, “Next.” I wasn’t done blinking.
I said “Hi.” He said “Nope.”
I asked, “Do you like cats?” She hissed.
We both tried to leave first. We’re still sitting there.
I brought a resume. She brought snacks.
I pitched myself like a startup. No funding.
Job Interview Meet-Cringe
Professional? Not always.
“Tell me about yourself.” “Well, I cry during ads.”
I shook hands. Forgot to let go.
My fly was down. Confidence was up.
“Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” “Eating tacos.”
I asked them if they had any questions.
I showed up early — and fell asleep in the lobby.
“I’m a team player.” I work alone.
They said “We’ll be in touch.” Still waiting.
I thanked them for their time. They hadn’t said goodbye.
I wore one black shoe and one blue. Just to see if they noticed.
Meat-ing Puns (Again!)
You can’t have too much deli-cious wordplay.
I met a brisket once. It was well-done.
Salami say it loud: we meat again!
Our steak was rare. Our connection was rarer.
I meat lovers everywhere I go.
Meat me at the corner — pastrami in hand.
Our relationship sizzled — until it got grilled.
He ghosted me — must’ve been cold cuts.
I bacon’t believe we just met.
She said she was vegan. I sausage out the back door.
Don’t roast me, I’m just here for the puns.
Famous Meet-Greets
Starstruck and stunned.
I met a celebrity. I said “Hi Mom!”
I waved at Ryan Reynolds. It was a cardboard cutout.
I met a singer — and sang at them.
I asked for a selfie. Got photobombed by their assistant.
I met a chef. Called them “food magician.”
I complimented an actor’s performance. Wrong actor.
I met a comedian. I tried to out-joke him. I failed.
I saw a celeb at Starbucks. Said nothing. Regret everything.
He signed my forehead. Still worth it.
I called her Beyoncé. She wasn’t.
Pet Meet-Ups
Where the dogs socialize better than the people.
Our dogs met. We barely made eye contact.
He sniffed my dog. I sniffed… awkwardness.
I asked her dog’s name. Forgot hers.
Our pets fell in love. We tolerated each other.
I brought treats. He brought allergies.
The dogs fought. We bonded.
Her dog peed on my shoe. Still a good day.
My cat judged everyone. Including me.
Our pets clicked. Our signals didn’t.
I said, “Good boy!” to her husband.
Random Stranger Laughs
Because sometimes the best meets are weird ones.
I met a guy who juggled bagels. Still my hero.
She asked for directions. I gave life advice.
We bonded over spilled coffee.
I complimented her jacket. She gave it to me.
We met waiting for a bus. Now we co-own a snake.
I asked, “Do you come here often?” It was a funeral.
We high-fived. Then missed. Twice.
I asked for the time. He offered a sandwich.
We met in an elevator. I pressed every button.
He sneezed. I said “Bless you.” We’re engaged.
Schoolyard Meet-Up Memories
From crayons to crushes.
We met during recess. He stole my glue stick.
She lent me a pencil. I proposed.
We were science partners. Exploded twice.
I met my best friend over a spilled juice box.
I asked, “Wanna be friends?” He said “No.” Now we’re besties.
We passed notes. Then got detention together.
She beat me at hopscotch. I never recovered.
Our first meet was over dodgeball. I dodged — her heart.
He shared his lunch. I shared my germs.
I asked to borrow a crayon. She said “Only if you color inside the lines.”
Restaurant Meet-Ups
Food + Friends = Frustratingly Funny.
I mispronounced the menu. He laughed.
I spilled my drink. She applauded.
We both ordered the same dish. Marriage confirmed.
I sneezed into my breadstick.
I asked if the soup was vegan. It wasn’t soup.
He tipped 3%. I tipped my chair.
We argued over appetizers. Then eloped.
The waiter knew her name. Red flag.
I ordered dessert first. He fell in love.
I got spinach in my teeth. He never told me.
Hotel Lobby Encounters
Strangers with luggage and eye contact.
We met at the breakfast buffet. He took my waffle.
I said “Good morning.” She said “It’s 2 p.m.”
He asked for directions. I offered mints.
I complimented her suitcase. It was mine.
I held the door. She walked into the glass.
We made awkward small talk. For 20 floors.
I asked if he was lost. He worked there.
We shared an elevator. And 3 seconds of silence.
I pet a service dog. The owner judged me.
I wore a robe to the lobby. Still no regrets.
Final Meet & Sweet
Where all puns come together.
We met through mutual awkwardness.
I introduced myself with a joke. They stayed anyway.
Our eyes met. Then our phones rang.
He forgot my name. I forgot his face.
We met for coffee. Now we meet for everything.
The first meet was weird. The second was wonderful.
We bumped into each other. Repeatedly.
We didn’t mean to meet. We were meant to.
I said, “Hi.” They said, “Hi.” History began.
Sometimes you meet the right people by accident. Sometimes with a pun.
FAQs
Are “meet” jokes appropriate for first dates?
Yes — just don’t say all 200 at once!
Can I use these jokes in social media bios?
Definitely! “Meat me IRL” is gold.
What’s the best pun for a meet-and-greet event?
“Let’s meat and mingle — rare connections welcome!”
Are these safe for work (SFW)?
100%. Except for emotional damage from awkward intros.
Can I turn these into pick-up lines?
Yes — but use responsibly. And bring snacks.
What’s a good “meat” pun for a BBQ invite?
“Let’s meat and grill like old friends!”
Can these be printed for icebreaker games?
Absolutely! Great for events, classrooms, and cringe parties.
What if someone groans at my meet joke?
That’s how you know you nailed it.
Where do I find more themed puns?
Right on PunsPlanet.com — your pun headquarters!
What’s a punny way to say goodbye after a first meet?
“Let’s meat again — same pun time, same pun channel.”
Conclusion
From handshakes to high-fives, first dates to last names, meetings shape our lives — and laughter makes them memorable. Whether your first impression is smooth or a total pun-derstorm, humor is the best hello.
👉 Share these with a friend, use them in your next awkward intro, and visit PunsPlanet.com for more pun-packed brilliance!
